Training to be Like Jesus

by Katie Harding

I still remember the “F” I brought home on the math test that day. Not because of the mistakes I made or the grade I received, but because of my dad’s response.

I failed the test because I didn’t follow directions. The teachers were trying to instill an important practice and told us to use commas in any answer that would be higher than the hundreds place, or it would be counted wrong. So if we wrote one thousand, it should be written like this: 1,000. Sounds simple enough, unless you just plain forget. Every number was right, but every answer was marked wrong. There wasn’t a comma to be found.

The failure I felt was devastating. As soon as my dad arrived home, I handed him the paper, hoping he would help relieve the pain of my suffering. He looked at the test and nodded his head when I explained the grade, and then he gently asked one of the most important questions of my life: “Did you learn anything?” He wasn’t as concerned about the grade as much as what I learned from the grade. He was all about the training.

“Did you learn anything?” He wasn’t as concerned about the grade as much as what I learned from the grade.

From middle school to high school, my dad recited certain phrases, similar to the one above, to further my training. When I whined that I wanted something, he would respond with “What you want and what you need, little girl, are two different things.” When I would cry, “It’s not fair,” he would answer with “Life’s not fair,” although he always tried to be fair and was willing to compromise. And when it snowed, which it often did in Northern Illinois, he reminded me before I left home with the keys, “If you feel you can’t do it, don’t let others tell you can, and if you feel you can, don’t let others tell you you can’t.” Although, this gave me permission to call him to come get me if I felt the roads were too risky to drive home — which I did once or twice, he was actually training me not to be ruled by other people's opinions. This lesson is still valuable today.

What made me think of my dad and this story isn’t that yesterday would have been his birthday and it snowed, but it was a verse I read in Hebrews 5 recently. “Although He [Jesus] was a Son, He learned obedience from the things which He suffered.” It’s hard to imagine that Jesus had to learn obedience, but of course He would as He was born in human likeness and emptied Himself of His equality with God (Phil 2:1-8).

When we suffer difficulties, we often seem surprised, acting as if they shouldn’t be happening to us. Even though Jesus told us otherwise, and said that in this world we will have trials and tribulations (John 16:33).

Many times we are allowed to suffer because God is training us. And I’m not referring to the type of suffering we experience in trauma or loss, but suffering as in not getting our way, feeling rejected, or even failing at something like I did. Think of Jesus’ experience with the Pharisees. He learned to keep His peace and entrust Himself to the Father despite the challenges He faced. He was allowed to suffer those ill-fated relationships because it provided good training. He learned to endure, persevere, and not retaliate when ridiculed. He learned boundaries for his mission, focus for his thoughts, and submission to the Father’s will.

“Although He [Jesus] was a Son, He learned obedience from the things which He suffered.”

This is why James encourages us to, “Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.” Trials can be seasons of great growth, allowing us to strengthen our faith by putting it into practice. Trials can train us to keep our peace, proceed with patience, and exercise self-control.

So as we begin a new year, let us change our footing to a better stance. Instead of automatically running from suffering or complaining about it to others, let us start leaning into these valuable times of training and look for the lessons we are to learn. As apprentices of Jesus, let us study how He did it and do likewise. A good place to start is 1 Peter 2:21-23.

And if you’re wondering, do I now use commas in numbers that are higher than the hundreds? The answer is yes, absolutely. Go in Peace.